Why we can’t have nice things: a person I follow on Twitter said that you should only send out photo Christmas cards as a married couple. She considers it tacky otherwise. I respectfully(ish) disagree. But I stopped sending out Christmas cards after her statement because it occurred to me that maybe other people had the same feeling? What for the rest of us?
Last week I had a discussion with Allison (via blog comments) about why I stopped sending cards. Partially it’s because I’m lazy, but also because I’m not married and don’t have kids or pets and what would people think? Why get so worked up over a nice gesture?
I am in a very long-term (and wonderful) relationship, of course. But I let some twerp’s comment on Twitter affect me.
But not this year.
No one gets to define what family looks like. No one. Not some asshole on Twitter. Not your boss. Not a stranger at the grocery store. Not a blog reader. Not Trump or Pence or anyone who came before or after. Sometimes your family is “traditional”: your parents and siblings and grandparents and aunts and uncles. Sometimes it’s you and your spouse. Sometimes it’s you and a boyfriend or girlfriend. Sometimes your significant other’s family becomes your own. Sometimes it’s a core group of friends. Sometimes it’s you and your pup. Maybe you’re a cat person, which is okay, too! As long as you love and feel loved, who cares about the source?
So maybe you send out a card with your family (whatever that looks like!), or you send one of just you, standing in front of your tree. Or in front of the ocean. Or at the top of the world. Or with a bottle of wine.
Sending out joint Christmas cards might have not been right for Ross and Mona, but it is right for me. And, because I’m a smart ass (with a heart of gold!), I created two cards this year:
Unfortunately the bottle of bourbon was cropped. You get the idea.
And the back. Because we all need booze to get through the hustle and bustle.
I created a nice, less sarcastic version for my parents and grandparents.
No one finds me as funny as I think I am.
There’s a lot of joy to go around when we stop taking everything so seriously. Don’t let anyone try to define your life or relationship(s), friends. Life doesn’t always go according to plan – and that can be a beautiful thing, if you let it.